At the New Zealand First conference Winston said immigrants to New Zealand should be subject to a test on New Zealand values. No mention of what they should be so perhaps we should try and pre-empt them.

An immigrant must be able to drink to excess; they must be able to steal anything, especially cars; and when challenged by police, be able to run, thereby inflicting possible mayhem on the rest of the public and resulting in probable deaths.

Of course, one must then blame the police for trying to catch them, thereby causing the mayhem and possible deaths.

If the immigrants don't already know how they must learn to abuse their partners and children and then refuse to admit their involvement.

If one lives in the Bay of Plenty they must be able to complain about "the bloody road" instead of slowing down and staying on their side of the white line – simple really.

I could go on, but Winston might get the impression I am being cynical or perhaps taking the mickey, which of course I'm not.

My values would be: learn English and practice what the 10 commandments preach. I wait with bated breath to see what NZ First or Winston thinks our values really are.

P Burrell, Katikati.