Brian Rogers Rogers Rabbits www.sunlive.co.nz

The government's idea of increasing class sizes didn't go down well with the New Zealand public.

In fact you could call it an epic fail.

Sometimes you have to wonder what planet our politicians are on. We did ponder this as Venus transited this week, and considered that, combined with the full moon, if the extra gravitational forces inside the Beehive have been affecting their thinking. And just as Venus passed, the Minister found her senses and U-turned.

Classroom space, the final frontier. Hekia Parata's announcements have sent some into orbit.

And in keeping with the ‘from another planet' theme, we see that a team from the Netherlands are planning a privately funded trip to the nether regions of the galaxy, with Mars One. It's a one-way voyage to the red planet to start a colony. It blasts off in 11 years, apparently, and those partaking are not coming back. They're staying for the rest of their lives.

And who knows, they may find intelligent life there. Lord knows, there ain't much left here.

To check it out and book your one-way flight, google Mars One or check it out on YouTube.

We expect there will be smaller class sizes there, in case you are still not happy with Hekia's plan for here.

We also have a small list of people we'd like to encourage to take a one-way trip to Mars. You may have some to add.
Meanwhile, as a result of the (now ditched) plan for fewer teachers and bigger classes, a wag posted an interesting device on a certain web trading site.

The ‘Edu-Grip' is a handle that attaches to the ceiling of classrooms which have standing room only.

One prankster's answer to classroom space: Handles for standing-room-only classes, advertised on TradeMe, before this week's spectacular government back-down.

The seller, Flipper3 says: 'There are real benefits to this new technology. With the ceiling mounted EDU-GRIP students will always be on their toes, always be ready for a new 'production line” standard of education. And students will always have their hands up. What a great indictor that they are actually learning.”

Gives a different perspective to the term ‘National STANDards'.
There are heaps of questions and Flipper has answered them all. It is great reading if you've got some time to fill in this weekend.
Now we have some internet things you should see. And due to diminishing standards of learning, I've had to increase your homework. Here are your weekend research topics.

This week's homework:

How Kiwis open beer. Showing our creative side. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4zceBfysUSg

Check out: Marcel Currin's very clever 'Rena V ukulele” song. We posted this on SunLive, and it was played on Breakfast TV. If you haven't seen it, here's the link at SunLive:
http://www.sunlive.co.nz/news/26044-ukelele-bashing-rena-song-released.html

Man, this girl can sing! Jasmine Poole. She has our vote!
http://www.sunlive.co.nz/news/25946-bay-auditions-nzs-got-talent.html

Parting shot

Finally, this piece, thanks to Wally:

The NZ Medical Association has weighed in on the Prime Minister's prescription fee increase.
The allergists voted to scratch it, but the dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.
The gastroenterologists had a sort of a gut feeling about it, but the neurologists thought the administration had a lot of nerve.
The obstetricians felt they were all labouring under a misconception. Ophthalmologists considered the idea short-sighted.
Pathologists yelled, 'Over my dead body!” while the paediatricians said, 'Oh, Grow up!”
The psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, while the radiologists could see right through it.
The surgeons were fed up with the cuts and decided to wash their hands of the whole thing.
The ENT specialists didn't swallow it, and just wouldn't hear of it. The pharmacologists thought it was a bitter pill to swallow, and the plastic surgeons said, 'This puts a whole new face on the matter....”
The podiatrists thought it was a step forward, but the urologists were pissed off at the whole idea.
The anaesthetists thought the whole idea was a gas, but the cardiologists didn't have the heart to say no.
In the end, the proctologists won out, leaving the entire decision up to the a***holes in Wellington.