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This week's Write Space by Janice Giles.

My mum buys junk from mail order catalogues. You know the type of thing: ‘Free gift with every order!' Or, ‘Congratulations, you have won $20,000!' Apparently, all you have to do to collect your prize or gift is place a minimum order.

Inevitably, the products are shoddy, the free gift is some trinket that would be bypassed in a $2 shop, and the prize is subject to a draw.

Somewhere in the catalogues there must be an explanation. I looked through some of mum's recent mail and found the fine print. And fine print it truly was: There must have been at least a page and a half of text condensed into less than a quarter of an A4 page. I couldn't read it with my glasses on, and I doubt even a magnifying glass would have helped much.

I wasn't so clear about all this when a catalogue arrived, addressed to me. It contained a scratch card which produced $1,000 times three. All I had to do was order $50 worth of product from the catalogue.

If I'd received this ‘prize' via email it would have immediately been relegated to the spam file. I was dubious. I checked the website. It looked legitimate. As far as I could tell, a draw to redistribute unclaimed prizes was looming. If I wanted my prize, I'd better buy something so I could put in my claim.

Three weeks went by without receiving either order or prize. I emailed the company. No reply. Another week and another email produced a response that they were running three weeks behind on orders. I followed up with emails for the next three weeks.

Eventually I received my order and an insulated coffee cup as my ‘comp prize'. Part of the order was a small table for self assembly. It didn't assemble properly - the pieces didn't fit, it kept falling apart, and the rickety table top sat at an unusable angle. I can return it. Apparently I'll get a refund. But postage is at my own cost- definitely a deterrent.

I've still not found an explanation as to the whereabouts of my $1000. Perhaps the fine print is somewhere on the order form or scratchy I returned, although I recall looking there for conditions and finding nothing of concern.

The short and embarrassing version of this story is that I got done, and I'm not surprised if many others have had similar experiences.