Poor Kate Mac Intyre, what a cheek, how dare she criticize Tauranga Grey Power's answer to Pauline Hanson.

I was so concerned with her well being I decided to trace her and offer my best wishes, after all there are not too many reasonable, caring middle of the road kind of Kiwis left. Kate was in shock but ‘ok' she immediately asked me how ‘C' had found out about the chains, do they have spies in Wellington? I don't know Kate, maybe it was just a stab in the dark. Oh my God what have you heard? Calm down I told her it's just a phrase, I swear I know nothing.

This was serious stuff so I rang Pauline (sorry”C”) now it's not easy to contact people with no first name, but I'm a stubborn soul. I needed to confirm a few figures. Is it true 'C” that you represent 85% of the population. Yes, he, she or it replied. That is an awful lot 'C” like 3 ½ million people. 'That's right, and if you and your friends are not careful we'll be rattling your chains too. Now I'm really worried, I had to placate this person. That seemed to do the trick.

Now I'm a dithering wreck. I took a good deep breath of good Kaimai air and called R. Paterson Hi, Mr, Mrs, or Ms Paterson. I'm feeling a little folksy and thought you may need cheering up. You seem confused about things like the similarity between South Africa and New Zealand. You also need someone to explain the meaning of indigenous. I'm not sure why but he or she hung up in my ear.

Was it a dream or a nightmare. In any event I'm going to ring 'John” in Wellington. He needs to know there's a tsunami about to hit. Blue rinse and all.

Robin Bell, Omanawa.