Lost and found half a century later

Motivational speaker Steffi August will reunite with her half-brother after 50 years, on December 19. Supplied photo.

For a good majority of her life, motivational speaker Steffi August felt that things just didn't add up when it came to her own identity.

In a time of confusion, desperation and feeling lost, she shares how one Papamoa-based clairvoyant became the unlikely answer to some of her most significant lifelong unanswered questions.

Read her story in her own words below.

Something wasn't right. Things just didn't add up. Why did I have brown hair and the rest of my family was blonde? Why did my father abandon me when my parents divorced when I was 10 years old?

When I had a breast cancer scare, my request for a family history was ignored. Something wasn't right and deep down I think I knew it my whole life, but my questions were met with a wall of silence. I found my answers at age 50, through a very unexpected route…

I grew up in communist East Germany. Freedom was limited, movement was restricted and monitored by the secret police – the Stasi.

Despite the obstacles in my way, my young family and I persevered and escaped to West Germany before the fall of the Berlin Wall. At the time, I considered this my greatest achievement, but after leaving Germany and moving to NZ without a visa, without speaking the language and without a job or friends, I am not sure anymore. I tell of these two life changing moments in my book, 'That's it! I'm OUT of here!”

In 2006, I returned to Germany to visit friends and family; which included a visit to see my dad. It was at this time, he dropped the bombshell, completely out of the blue: 'I'm not your real father”.

After absorbing the shock and listening to him explain everything, it all fell into place for me, and everything now made sense, but also raised a whole new set of questions:

So, who was my father? Where was he? Was he looking for me?

I returned to New Zealand confused and lost. I mulled over things for a few months, but I was desperate for answers.

A friend recommended I visit a clairvoyant in our area. Although sceptical, I needed answers.

I nervously drove to her house. She knew nothing of my situation or why I wanted to meet her. She greeted me and we sat down. She looked straight at me and said, 'You are here to find out about your father.” I was gobsmacked. I silently nodded. She carried on.

'You have a half-brother. He lives in Germany, in West Germany”. She described my real father; his character and a white German marine uniform with medals.

Although grateful, this raised even more questions. I had a brother?

Although scared, I summed up all my courage and confronted my mother with the information a few months later.

She was surprised by what I knew, she had no intention of ever telling me. She had even prepared some letters and hidden them in a box, to be given to me once she was gone.

Since I knew, she explained: She had a one-night-stand which resulted in an unexpected pregnancy, and her partner then husband, accepted me as his own. He stood by her out of love.

My mother then surprised me, and actually helped me investigate my bloodline.

We learned that my real father had married, divorced, and had a son. She contacted his ex-wife, and got some pictures of my dad. She found out that he never knew of my existence, and unfortunately had committed suicide many years earlier in 1991.

Now I had to be brave. I called my biological father's ex and told her that I wanted to make contact with my half-brother. She agreed to speak with Guido and get in touch if he was interested.

I did not hear anything. I lost hope. Days turned to weeks, then months. Nine years passed, without any contact.

One day, I felt brave and contact my father's ex again. She admitted that she never talked to him about me.

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry, to be furious or thankful. Yes, I wished she had told him immediately, and was annoyed that she hadn't. But maybe this was the only reason he hadn't contacted me. Maybe he, too, would be excited to find he had a half-sister on the other side of the world.

This time I wasn't going to leave it up to his mother. I asked for Guido's email address, and contacted him myself. Then I waited.

I heard nothing for a while, but got an email from Guido on April 1, 2016. Was it an April Fools' Day joke? First, I was terrified to open the message, but I started screaming loudly once I had. My brother was happy to hear from me and wanted to get to know me, his long-lost older sister. After 49 years and despite 20,000km between us, we had found each other!

The next bit is a bit of a blurr. We hit it off right away and regularly emailed, phoned and Skyped. We had many similarities.

After almost 50 years, we needed to meet. We needed to share a big hug. Since I had found him, he was going to come to NZ to find me now. I was ecstatic!

But this is not where the story ends…

In making the plans for his trip to NZ, I asked Guido if he wanted some company and whether he would be open to travelling to NZ with my best friend from school who was too scared to make the trip on her own.

They made contact to discuss flights etc and had an instant bond. They have now met up several times, are excited as a couple of giggling school girls about their adventure to NZ and have even talked about being in love! I wonder if I have found a brother and will add my best friend as my sister in the new future?

The two of them are now set to arrive into NZ on December 19 to spend Christmas and New Years with my family and I in Mount Maunganui.

So, if you want to see what a hug is like after half a century apart, come along and watch. I'll be the one holding a sign that says:

United after 50 years mystery.

My brother I never knew I had, arrives TODAY.

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