Gwyn Brown Tauranga Dive

Tauranga has long been considered the bible belt of NZ. I'm not particularly religious myself, too much a Spock fan, the logic is illogical as it were. But by crikey have we taken a hammering fishing/diving-wise with the weather.

‘The worst season in 40 years' is the expression I've heard a lot lately, and that's about right. And now it seems we have, at the time of writing this, cyclone Winston bearing down on the country.

Much like the forthcoming election I imagine. Although, the mighty Winston will be peddling his witty repartee further north seeing as the good folk of Tauranga have chosen not to continue our relationship with him.

And I mean the politician, not the cyclone of course, although I can see how there could be some confusion. But anyway…

The weather gods do seem to be having a tantrum at the moment. You know it's rough when even the old fellers in their tinny, who usually sit in the entrance catching all the fish, won't venture past the Tangaroa statue.

The wind has been so bad the clean-up team working on the Rena are still going as they have had to pick their working days carefully. The reef was supposed to be open mid-February but it's looking more like the end of March. Just a rumour too that I've heard, not the gospel truth mind you, or belief, or whoever you believe.

Speaking of belief, I've decided to start supporting Poseidon, the Greek god of the sea. He's had a bit of a bad rap in the last 2000 years. The guy could probably do with a break, and as the God of the Sea, he may just settle the weather for me. Course, I'm going to have to follow his rules I suppose.

There are apparently some 1700 current worshippers of Poseidon, according to Uncle Google. Not huge numbers I'll grant you, but if I join up I can get in on the ground floor. There isn't a registered group in NZ so far as I am aware, so I could be in with a chance.

The Poseidon worshippers are not as popular as the Hellenism Pagans, who worship the whole team including the big kahuna Zeus. I base that claim on the fact they have a magazine going for them. Anyone with a magazine, or a book published about what they believe, must be right.

Poseidon seems the right fella to go for too, seeing as we are in the same business. Apparently, all I have to do is accept him, believe him, and make a few sacrifices. The bloody kind, of course. Looks like the wife is going to lose one of her pigs after all, sorry about that dear.

Seems a bit unfair to sacrifice a land animal to a water god. But who am I to question a pagan belief that is thousands of years' old. And if it settles the weather for a bit, I have another kuni kuni right where that first one came from.