Some media commentators have been speculating that the recession might be showing signs of improvement, others suggest it's a Dead Cat Bounce.

That's a curious term from the finance sector that I think should be explored further.
Firstly, I've never seen a dead cat bounce, although I have seen the odd possum rebound. (If you're quick, you can whip off a limb or two in that moment of weightlessness)
On a couple of occasions, hedgehogs have highjumped and pukeho performed power-assisted takeoff. Cousin Oscar once caused a rat to ricochet and my buddy Huff made a ferret momentarily levitate. On a rare occasion, we witnessed a mouse spontaneously combust. (Nasty accident involving lighter fluid, a barbecue and reckless campers)
But deceased feline defiance of gravity? Not a common sight in my experience. Sure, plenty of live ones are regularly put into orbit by alert citizens such as myself.
In the interests of both science and as a gesture to the finance sector, I would like to graciously offer some fine specimens for further experimentation of the Dead Cat Bounce theory.
Of course the first army volunteer is that brave member of our own family:
1. Ralph.
Even as a write this, I see his evil little yellow eyes narrowing at me, not impressed that I could be offering his name forward as a brave pioneer to push the boundaries of modern science. What a trooper.
My next nominee for inclusion in the experiment is:
2. The Ginger Bastard from up the road in Te Puna.
He slinks into our backyard on regular stealth missions to raid Ralph's collection of fishheads, before I've had a chance to allow them to 'mellow”.
Not only that, Ginger Bastard has a particularly nasty left hook and therefore we would be benefitting the feline gene pool if he was removed. Lord knows, it would make the streets safer.
GB would also make an interesting freefall experiment because I believe he is full of air, therefore likely to produce a most satisfying bounce. I know he is full of air, because in numerous encounters
I have heard it escaping, quite a notable hissing sound emanates from his front quarters. And if you chase him hard enough, occasionally there's emissions from the hindquarters on takeoff (that could be a by-product of excessive fish heads).
Finally, my third candidate for Dead Cat Bounce trials should be:
3.The MGM Lion.
The one that roars at the start and finish of the Metro Goldwyn Mayer movies. It can be quite disturbing for a hard-working dog to hear that roar from the corner of the lounge during dozy evening snoozes.
Seeing that great pussy face-planted on the pavement would put a smile on the dial of every canine I know. Let's give that oversize mangy mouser a special send-off.
And speaking of special, check out John the Aussie Butchers' specials, which don't include fish heads.

'Mary Once Had a Little Lamb'

2 marinated lamb chops (from Aussie Butcher) per person. Grill your lamb chops on prepared grill for about 5 minutes per side or until done to your taste. Serve with avocado salsa.

Avocado Salsa
Ingredients
1 avocado, peeled and diced
4 small tomatoes, diced
1 small red onion, diced
1 green pepper, seeded and diced
1 jalepeno, finely diced
1 green chile, finely diced
1 garlic clove, minced
Salt to taste
2 Tbsp red wine vinegar
1 Tbsp olive oil
4 drops Tabasco sauce

Method
Combine the vegetables in a medium bowl. Mash the garlic. Add the vinegar, oil and Tabasco sauce. Pour over the vegetables and toss to combine the ingredients. Serve chilled or at room temperature.

Wash it down with:

Planter's Rum Punch

Ingredients
1 part rum
1 part orange juice
1 part pineapple juice
¼ cup fresh lime juice
¼ cup grenadine
Mix all ingredients together. Serve over ice with pineapple wedge, orange twist and cherry on a toothpick.